He liked being part of the evening routine. Hudson had dressed them for bed the night before. 'Whichever one slept in the green and yellow frog pajamas.' Was I a bad mother for not being awake enough to realize which twin I had fed in the dark? He didn’t think so, at least. He padded into the bathroom and shut the door, but called out, 'Which one was it?” Thankfully, Hudson didn't really seem to be awake enough to notice that I’d just been standing there, wondering if I was okay, if my swirling thoughts were normal or symptomatic. I wondered how long I’d been staring at myself before he walked in. Took the bottle and was right back out.' I reached for my eye cream, to have something to do. I met his gaze in the mirror as he came up behind me and placed a kiss on the top of my head. 'There you are,' Hudson's voice was gravelly with sleep. The trouble was, both Alayna’s wore this face. I looked exactly like the woman I was-Alayna Reese Withers Pierce. Tired and worn out, maybe, but that was to be expected. On the outside I looked healthy, in control, normal. My hair was a tangled mess from bed, but it had been recently cut and styled. I was starting to develop wrinkles when I smiled, but otherwise my face still looked young and cared for, thanks to the best beauty products. I stared at myself in the mirror, at the light circles under my eyes-signs of motherhood. Someone familiar, but not me.īut it was all me. It almost felt like a different Alayna who had spent days and weeks obsessing over the tiniest things. When I was on the other side of it, completely “normal,” whatever that meant, I could see the unreasonableness from before. The thing about being a person with a history of acting crazy was that I couldn’t tell myself if my thoughts and actions were sane. You think because she’s on bedrest you can protect her? How sweet. With your perfect child and your perfect home. You act so high and mighty, you and your perfect pregnant wife, Alayna. Visit to find out more about me and all my books. Sign up for my newsletter where you’ll receive a free book every month from bestselling authors, only available to my subscribers, as well as up-to-date information on my latest releases and a free story from me sent a chapter a time (sent May 2018 - spring 2019). I’m so grateful that I want to give you FREE things: No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

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